Uber Clueless…

I watched Clueless in channel 42 last night… Lol… movie plus. Coincidentally, i was thinking about something related to that. Yeah, lol… friends… Once again, i am thinking about finding that certain person again. Why is it like that? I mean, i had driven this thought out of my head already, and now it is coming back again… Life is just a crap. I hate it for making me yearn for that certain warmth again. But then again… We really don't know what will happen in the future… I mean, who we will end up basically with. So, maybe i just have to wait right here for that someone to come. I mean, God will be nice to give a good person, right? *sigh* It's just that… I wish… it was him… It's these times thinking this stuff makes me cry. I mean, it is our last year already, and me… I don't know whether my parents will send me to some country far away from him to study there, meaning… We won't see each other anymore… Unless fate really had written the love story for us. But that's just a bunch of folktale… It's not true that you feel it in your heart that a someone is already the right person. It's just a story of putting up hopes that someone out there is really destined. I mean, duhh… In this world of 6 billion people, there is someone just meant for you? Nahh, I don't think so.  But it's nice to think so, right? I mean, I have those dreams too, and sometimes… I just want to believe them, that he would be standing right there waiting… and when he finds you, he would just rush there and say, "There you are… I thought you'd never come. I was waiting like… forever." Would you say that to me one day? That you were waiting for me to come by? LOL… Who am I kidding? I have to pop this dream out of my head and continue my studies… Especially when i know that i am slacking off… I have to get this thought out of my head and just concentrate.

True Friends Will Last Forever…

"Boys may pass and go, but real friends would stay there by your side, unfailing."

It's a nice feeling. To know that you guys are going to be there, no matter what happens. To hug me when i feel so down, to smile when i can't… To make my way when i feel like i can't go on. Maybe i just realized that now. When i know that Kimmy will take a Christmas vacation somewhere… I'm not sad because she is going away, because i know she would come back somehow… But i feel sad for myself, because i would miss her… Think of the seconds that will pass this Christmas wherein in the usual days we just talk about nonsense, the jokes we had, corny or not… Everything… I just wished i made a lot of memories for us this past year. That we had taken a lot of pictures… Because we don't know where life would take us next year, or in the future… Would we still see each other? Will we be able to hang out like we used to? I don't want to hear the answers somehow… Because what if i wouldn't hear what i wanted to hear? It would break my heart… and now that things seem closing so fast… I feel like crying just like a little kid…

Speaking right through my Heart…

I don't know why i am feeling like this. A friend of mine… She was falling for someone that she knows is very far from her… Literally. A 14-hour difference. How could she still feel something for the guy? Is it because of his eyes that i know she has absolutely fallen in love with? No… That's not it… It would seem too… light. It was something i know… was very much deeper… than that. Like what i am feeling right now. Deep and emotional. I felt her pain when she told me that he told her it seems just so impossible. And she said "uh… yeah." and then pretended to be happy about it, but i know inside… She was breaking down. That was the first time i ever saw her with those glittery eyes that springs up when you're in love. But you know, it's not her situation that made me cry the most. It was my own situation. Someone quoted to me… "The greatest distance isn't how many million stars he is away, or even how much time you are so apart, but the greatest distance that you know he is there beside you that you are able to grasp him already but you cannot do anything about it." I told her that. My situation was worser than hers. At least he is just that far. You can reach him someday. But a guy that is just right beside you, and is even your friend, and yet he seems so far away, that's something that should be worrying you more. But I know that God is there though. He'll help, i just know. I prayed to him that i may overcome this feelings of emptiness when i comes to him. That i shouldn't think of this now because there will come the time for this. But probably not now. Maybe I should consider the thought that i should think more on the things which needs my attention more at this moment. And just wait for the time when our paths will meet again. He and I…